Often people will ask whether it would be better to see a male or female therapist. Other times, it is seen as something irrelevant and too demanding. But for many people, the gender of your therapist will and does matter. Why? Because whomever you choose to work with needs to be someone you feel comfortable opening up to.
Your comfort level will directly impact your treatment. If you are not comfortable with your therapist then you may never fully share with them some of the issues you are struggling with. Unlike your doctor, therapist do not have the ability to draw labs and run x-rays to gather information about your symptoms. Therapist rely on what you disclose to inform the treatment plan. If you are not able to share what you are experiencing then your providers ability to provide effective treatment is hampered.
Women Work With Women and Men Work With Men…Right?
There is no hard and fast rule that states what gender preference an individual might have when seeking a provider. It has to do with your personal comfort level. This is one of the times when I will tell people that you have every right to ask about gender, race, religion, and other beliefs that may impact your care. If you identify as a Queer man and feel more comfortable working with an LGBTQ+ female then let that be made clear.
Sexuality, body image, abuse…are all issues that are regularly addressed in therapy. If you are a female that has a history of sexual abuse or harassment, and want to work with a female that makes sense. In some cases, young men might feel comfortable with a male role model figure as a therapist. There are no hard and fast rules. It’s all about what will make you as the patient the most comfortable.
The ultimate goal is to do the work to getting you to a better state of wellness. Whether that means that you require a therapist of the same faith, same/different gender, similar sexual orientation, or other factor that is not only fine it is important to your care. Your progress is dependent on the establishment of a relationship between you and your therapist. It’s hard to build a relationship with someone that you do not feel fully comfortable with; even if they are highly skilled, kind, and personable.
Ask Questions
When you are looking for a provider explore their biography and get to know them as much as you can. See if based off the information shared you feel comfortable. The next step would be to setup a consultation if possible. Whenever you can setup a consultation rather than an appointment I would encourage you to do so. It could just be a quick phone call. This gives you the opportunity to ask some questions and get a sense whether or not this is someone you could see yourself opening up to.
I cannot speak for all therapist but I believe I speak for the majority…if you meet and it does not feel like a good fit, let us know. Let me know what you need? What you are looking for? What might help to make therapy more accessible? If you share with me what your needs are then I will do what I can to connect you with a colleague that might be a good fit. At the end of the day I want to see everyone get access to quality care with a provider they feel safe with and trust.
Want to see if I might be a good fit? Take a look at my About Me page, check out our YouTube channel to get a sense of my communication style, and if you feel comfortable setup a consultation. You can schedule a free consultation directly on our website.
https://woodruff-counseling.com/about/
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aYuS3ETW0ac&t=15s